nirfy

So behind on mah NANo writing... *dies* Hope it will be done soon...

I was hyper-happy all day. Whee!

Yay for online quizzes ^^



F:

Your Beauty lies
in Contradiction. Controversial, unpredictable, and
never what anyone expects.
You appearance and your personality are two
opposite things. Even your
appearance sends different signals to different
people. To some you may look
innocent and sweet, to others you look mysterious
and intimidating at the same
time. No one ever knows what to expect with you.
You are a little bit of
everything all mixed together. You can be watching
the football game with the
guys one minute and the next out shopping at the
mall. You seem to be almost a
different person every time you meet someone, but
at the same time you know
exactly who you are and there is always that one
thing that makes you you. You
enjoy keeping people guessing and people love how
completely unpredictable you
are.

Some Things
That Represent You:

Element:
Fire, Water Animal: Chameleon Color:
Dark Tones, Light
Tones Song: Everything by Alanis Morriesette
Expression:
Half-smile

Gemstone:
Opal Mythological Creature: Gryphon,
Half-breeds Sign:
Gemini Planet: Mars Hair Color: Red
Eye Color:
Brown

Quote:
"Appearances can be deceiving."

Where Does Your Beauty Lie? ..::Original Pictures Are Back! Detailed Results::..
brought to you by Quizilla




Your anime hair color is green.


What is your anime hair color?
brought to you by Quizilla



Your element is earth: Wise, solitary, mysterious
and loving. You are very wise. Your wise as in
you know things others do not, you can see past
stereotypes and see the real people behind
their facades, and people will often come to
you for help and advice. Quite solitary and
somewhat shy around people because you prefer
animals and plants, animals aren't afraid to
show themselves or what they are feeling and
plants are fun to nurture. You are very strong
in your silence if you set your mind on
something you will often times pursue it to the
end. Sometimes you just want to get away, so
you seek refuge in the forest where you can
have time to think and try to sort out your
emotions. The sound of the wind usually calms
you, especially moving through the trees. Life
to you is something precious and should not be
taken for granted.


.:-|What is your true element?|-:. -With Anime Pictures and detailed answers-
brought to you by Quizilla

I try to make everything better for everyone, and what happens? It all just comes back and slaps me in the face. I can't stand you. I wish I could get as far away from you as possible. I hate it when you fight, and it really hurts me. You just don't understand that... and you want me to get all of your problems, and listen to what you have to say. It's too much. I feel like I'm going to explode. Just shut the hell up and leave me alone. i want to be happy, I want to be your friend, but you just want to use me to get revenge, and you wnat to tear apart every good aspect of me. Well, I'm sorry for wanting to help. I'm sorry that I wanted to resolve your problems. Maybe if you just put down that cigarette for a second and considered how much damage you're causing me, you'd stop being such a bitch. I live to make you happy... your anger really is killing me.

I was all happy... then I listened to 'The Wall' too much and got depressed. And I raked the leaves around Cleo's graves and thought about how much I missed her. When I was reallly little, Maggie told me she was a bobcat becuase she had ear tufts... I called her my baby bobcat for so long... I miss you so much, Cleo. What will Christmas be like without a calico sleeping under the tree?

I also thoiught about how much I completely and utterly despise my charcter Blue, despite the fact that he's nice and the other charcters in my story cheat on him/abuse him/ are really possessive of him. But he doesn't understand anyone's motives. Mai is an angsty slut, and Yume is a whiny little bitch, but I love them so much becuase I poured out my soul into them through their development. Blue dies in the end, but not without taking Mai with him first. What a bastard. True, he had a reason... but I love Mai so much. She's just... I don't know. she's got soemthing about her that i really lie. Probably because she's insane. I mean, only really crazy people fall in love with psychos in asylums for no reason. But that's Mai for ya... I'm going to go to bed now.

List of what I need to make for everyone (This is the only place where I won't lose it)

Ameko~ Kyo-kun hat (fabric purchased)
Alaina~ Puppy hat (done! Wai! =^^=), black/purple cat ear headband (fabric purchased)
Julia~ Black cat ear headband, cat gloves (fabric purchased)
Nora~ Polar bear hat (fabric purchased)
Maddie~ Knit arm warmers and matchingknit hat (Almost done!)
Max~ Green cat hat with 'XP' face (fabric purchased)
Maggie~ WHAT THE HECK DO YOU WANT?!? @www@
Nora (Mulligan)~ Moose Hat! =^^= I don't even know if I'll have time to make this...(fabric purchased)
Tommy~ Tell me what you want or I will pester you to death!

Hmm... I know I'm missing people...


Yesterday was fun... I went to Julia's birthday party, and we did karaoke (yay David Gray!)and played Katamari (I still have the soundtrack stuck in my head... na, na na na na na na na na...)and then I went babysitting and the kids were quiet and we watched Pokemon Heroes (which was pretty bad, but James was in it, so I was happy ^^), and then I put them in bed and watched late-night anime, which I can never do at home. FullMetal Alchemist was AWESOME except that the dub voices sucked. And Ghost in the Shell was really cool, despite what Ameko had told me about it. Inuyasha was fun, except that there was this weird Naraku incarnation person who didn't like wearing clothes much, since he rarely had anything on. I didn't like him... he was ugleh >< ANd Bebop was on! Yay! I lurve Waltz for Venus so much ^^ I didn't get to see the ery end, but I've seen it before on more than one occasion, so it didn't matter. I drew some more Aysel, and decided taht my warped almost-incestuous crossdressing bunny twins Alek and Kela should both be dating her. Yay for fucked-up storylines! My insane crackhead charcters are fun, because they're everything I'm not. I can express a side of myself that will never come out in real life, because I'm not the kind of person that does anything that Aysel and her friends do. Yep... fun... I fifnsihed Alaina's christmas hat, and it's cute and has doggie ears... I'm pretty happy with it. And I made my own armwarmer pattern, and made a pair for Julia's birthday present... and I made myself a pair too. Woo! And I got 80 bucks from babysitting, most of which I'll spend on fleece ^___^ I'm so addicted to it... it's so fuzzeh... and I designed a skirt taht I'll try to make and put into use before Christmas, if I can find giant bells to sew onto the bottom. It's lime green.... yay for mismatching-ness! I'm high on fatigue again... I was up until two babysitting... I need to finish my homework... yep... so... bai! =^^=

Yay! My day was fun... I think I'm high on tired-ness. Wheeeeeee...

I went on an uber hike today wif my mom and sister and drew at the top of the mountain... I drew this squirrel that Tommy and I saw one day last year. It ran across the road, and a truck went over it, buit it ran around in circles under the truck, and then ran over to the same side of the road it started on. I nearly passed out becuase I was so afraid it would die ^^;; But it was okay... and I suggested that it had eaten drugs the stoner kids had dropped at the stoner wall... Her name is Aysel, and she's a crackhead. I had been listening to Pink Floyd's 'Comfortably Numb' for about an hour, looped, and then I realized that it was about drugs, and I wanted to draw someone on drugs ><;; So... I did... and whee! I now have my very own squirrel anthro, which I've never had before, and a crackhead character, which I also have never had before. Her hair is so messy and whee ^^ it's like Huskie's Odile. (http://fanarchive.net/Artists/Huskie/Odille.jpg) Except messier... and I got Furuba number 5 with Kisa in it! She's cute ^^ and Newtype with an EVA pinup... that scary one with Rei and her plugsuit and giant boobs... but the other side has massive robots and evil, so I dun mind ^^ And DN Angel episode 1! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY.... *dies*

ARGH! I'M SO BEHIND IN NANOWRIMO... I NEED TO TYPE MORE! RAAAWR...

Anyways... Lessee... Day wasn't too bad. I'm probably getting sick with whatever Tommy and/or Allie have...

"It's either or, you bitch!"

Random something I heard in the ahll. Much fun.

I talked with Alaina for a while today, and the conversation ended up making me hate myself. But then I felt better. And then I hated myself. And then I hated hating myself. And then I just wanted to curl up and die. But then I felt better again. And then I saw my vampire alien writer buddy Maggie, and our charcters had fun trying to get into eachothers pants, and kill eachother, and smoke pot. Even though Tobi's not very good at it. Yeah... we're writing a crossover wif out NaNo charas. It's all good. Currently, Tobi's getting stoned, Hono's mad at Tobi, Ta'xet's licking blood off a wall, and Acid and Loki are dancing around shoeless in an upscale restraunt singing 'wakka wakka wakka', and a doggie boy is hitting on Loki ^^;; Much fun!

Well, I finally got myself a 'Vent Book.' It was Alaina's idea- to get a book so that I can draw all my gory pictures that I do when I'm angry or depressed in one place and keep it with me so I don't get scared that other people will find them. I often decide not to take out my feelings on paper because of this fact, and turn to more destructive behaviors. So this will be a good thing ^^ I already drew a front page… It has Krypta and she’s all, ‘Git yer dirty paws off!’ because people always lift up my sketchbooks and flip through them despite that the front says ‘no touchie’ and that I repeatedly tell them not to. Hopefully a warning page will scare people off, or at least give them the hint that I DON’T WANT THEM POKING THEIR NOSE INTO MY SKETCHBOOKS WITHOUT ASKING! I doubt it. Graar. I pour my soul into my art, and sometimes I put things into the pages of my sketchbook I don’t want anyone else to see. So please, if you’re reading this and you do this, take a hint and DON’T DO IT ANYMORE. This is the worst when it’s someone who isn’t close to me, and is disturbed by nudity or violence or homosexuality. Then they go all ‘O.o’ on me and I have to take it away and make up some feeble excuse for it.

Since I’m all riled up now, I shall rant about something else that has been getting on my nerves lately. Someone (who hopefully will never find out that I have an LJ) has been stalking me continuously. I mean, he follows me when I get a drink, when I go outside during lunch, when I walk home… He followed me all the way to my block once, despite that his house was really far away. And he just won’t take a hint and leave me the heck alone! Although I don’t act like it, it does bother me. And I’m too much of a wimp to ask him to give me more space (although I finally worked up the courage to say so today when he asked me over IM why I wasn’t around after school because he wanted to walk home with me.) I love his sister- she adopted me as ‘her freshman’ when I was new, and she was a cool senior-person - so I feel I owe her something, and being nice to her brother who, honestly, doesn’t have very many friends is something I feel very obligated to. I just wish he’d try and make some other friends, or stalk someone else. Christ Jesus, I feel very guilted into being nice to him all the time. In fact, I feel guilted into very many things. I’m sick and tired of having people push me around all the time. I always feel like I should make people happy, and so I do everything for everyone. But, really, people, think about not making me feel so bad when I want some time to myself, or when I don’t want to do the same thing as you. It doesn’t mean I hate you, just that I need some alone time. Please, please, please keep that in mind.

I always lie and say I'll rant here, but I lie. LIE!!!

1. Who are you?

2. Are we friends?

3. When and how did we meet?

4. How have I affected you?

5. What do you think of me?

6. What's the fondest memory you have of me?

7. How long do you think we will be friends?

8. Do you love me?

9. Do you have a crush on me?

10. Would you kiss me?

11. Would you hug me?

12. Would you do anything else to me?

13. Physically, what stands out?

14. Emotionally, what stands out?

15. Do you wish I was cooler?

16. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I?

17. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.

18. Am I loveable?

19. Describe me in one word.

20. What was your first impression?

21. Do you still think that way about me now?

22. What do you think my weakness is?

23. Do you think I'll get married?

24. What makes me happy?

25. What makes me sad?

26. What reminds you of me?

27. If you could give me anything what would it be?

28. How well do you know me?

29. When's the last time you saw me?

30. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?

31. Do you think I could kill someone?

32. Are you going to put this on your myspace and see what I say about you?

"we should throw them over. I mean, overthrow them."

Yup. Life is grood. I mean great. And good. good and great. I talked to the school psychologist-no worries... all is right with the world. Dammit, I'm tired.

Today, in health, we watched a movie about a girl who cut herself. And my teacher, Ms. Nigro, talked about some self-abusers pick scabs repetitively, etc tec... basically, that cutting wasn't the only thing people did. And she also said that it wasn't just depression that spurred self-injury, but also that anxiety can. I guess that makes me a self-abuser then... When I'm sad or anxious or nervous, I bite my nails until they bleed, I pick my scabs, I tear my skin off... it's worse than a nervous habit. I really can't stop dong it either. Even when it hurts a lot, I keep on doing it, sometimes without even noticing. I told Allie about this, and she said I should go talk to the school psychologist. Which isn't such a bad idea, seeing that I'm afraid this will progress into something worse. Self-abuse is an addiction, and I really am addictive. Even when I was typing this, I was biting away my almost non-existent nails without even noticing it. It doesn't help that I'm uber fidgety and gnaw on things without noticing a lot. Yeah... I'm all ranted-out. g'night.

Yep. I'm back... Alive... not like anyone reads this anyway. I just need a semi-private rant space, is all. I'll talk Tuesday...

I stole this from Psychedelicmind on DA... woot! I love these quizzes ^^

o - yes
x - no
~ - depends

Would you ever....

() worry about me if you notice I'm sad?
() go out with me?
() give me your number?
() let me kiss you?
() watch a movie with me... even a really sappy one?
() let me take you out to dinner?
() drive me somewhere/anywhere?
() take a shower with me?
() let me draw something for you?
() draw something for me?
() be my gf/bf?
() have a fling with me?
() visit me if you come to my city?
() listen to me if I called you crying even if you were out with all of your friends?
() buy me a drink if i didn't have money?
() take me home for the night?
() let me sleep in your bed?
() sing car karaoke with me?
() sit in the doctors office with me because I didn't want to go alone?
() re-post this for me to answer your questions?
() let me give you a piggyback ride?
() have sex with me?
() come pick me up at 3 am because my car ran out of gas in the middle of nowhere?
() give me your mail address to be penpals?
() be scared to talk to me?

1: grab the book nearest to you. turn to page 18, find line 4. write down here what it says: "...and men-at-arms reqarding her with reproach."
2: stretch your left arm out as far as you can. what do you touch first?: The comp screen... O.O
3: what is the last thing you watched on TV?: the wild thornberries! w00t!
4: WITHOUT LOOKING, guess what the time is: 2:00-ish?
5: now look at the clock, what is the actual time?: 2:20 (wah), i lose
6: with the exception of the computer, what can you hear?: my teeth hitting eachother, the TV, people walking around upstairs (prob'ly my mom)
7: when did you last step outside? what were you doing?: I closed the door, cuz someone left it open
8: before you came to this website, what did you look at?: vivadawolf's art! It is teh spiffy ^^
9: what are you wearing?: red long-sleeve, nice khakis, kitty socks (how surprising) and a coat.
10: did you dream last night? what about?:I'm sure i did... i dun remember...
11: when did you last laugh? why?: ... I have no idea...
12: what is on the walls of the room you are in?: som eboring solors... a bunch of pics by my enine year old sister. and a map.
13: seen anything weird lately?: *looks at self* yeah...
14: what do you think of this quiz?: tis fun... unusual!
15: what is the last film you saw?: I dunno... .hack/sign isn't a film. -_-;;
16: if you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?: a ps2, copic markers, prismacolor pencils, better inking pens, good art skills?
17: tell me something about you that most people don't know: I recently (as in last nighta) decided that i'm not a cat... i'm a hyena/raccon crossbreed.
18: if you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?: I would... kill off all the evil people. or i'd make the environment all perfect and clean again.
19: do you like to dance?: not in front of other people... ever.
20: George Bush: is... a person.
21: imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?: I'd call her Kiyone, or something pretty... electra? celeste? yes.
22: imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?: Damion! Or Kane! I'm so insane... i like Carrick ^^
23: would you ever consider living abroad?: OOH! I wanna go to Tokyo :P
24: will you pass on this survey?: *gets an F* I didn't even know that was possible... poo.

too lazy to say anything.

01. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
02. Am I loveable?
03. How long have you known me?
04. When and where did we first meet?
05. What was your first impression?
06. Do you still think that way about me now?
07. Have you ever dated me?
08. Have you ever WANTED to date me?
09. Have we kissed?
10. Do you want to kiss me?
11. If we could spend one day doing anything of your choosing, what would it be, and why?
12. What do you think my weakness is?
13. Do you think I'll ever get married?
14. What makes me happy?
15. What makes me sad?
16. What reminds you of me?
17. What is my best quality?
18. How well do you think you know me?
19. When's the last time you saw me?
20. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
21. Do you think that I could kill someone?
22. Who would play me in a movie?
23. If I were to be a color, what one would I be?
24. Describe me in one word:
25. Do you think our friendship/relationship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?
26. Do you think that I am stubborn?
27. Are you going to put this on your livejournal and see what I say about you?

YAY! Almost Christmas! Great day to spend time with friends and family... and eat food... and get.. i mean give presents! I really want a DVD player... my family has none. poo :(

On the bright side, Allie ( LJ member ameko_no_mori) gave me Excel Saga manga #1! Which Tommy promptly borrowed (stole) in excange for pocky... I also got pretty crayola colored pncils from my favorite senior Caroline. Been using them nonstop since last Monday...

On Tuesday I was supposed to go see all my friends in NYC ( went to school in NYC from fourth to eighth grade, so I'm ina new school now)but it was cancelled, so now I'm a bit bummed.
On Monday, the 23rd, I went over to Allie's house to sleep over. We ended up going to bed a bit later than expected. I woke up late and almost missed the train i was taking in with my mom and sister. I ended up making it, but had no time to hang out with my friends. I had a great time with my mom instead. The three of us (my sis was there too)went to Rockerfeller Center, and saw the beautiful big tree of glee. We watched the ice-skaters ice skate (well duh) and then ate our traditional pieces of really expensive Teuschers(sp?) chocolate. Then we browsed stores! My sister was overjoyed to see that American Girl place was in the area (she's 9) and I had been looking forward to going into Pokemon Center NY since-when? fifth grade? Even though I'm not as obsesssed with it anymore (there are much better animes out there) it's still cute. And meowth kicks butt.


Here are some snippets of conversation with Susan, my awesome dude-ical friend from my old school:

tacobellriver: i'm gonna be your groupie
tacobellriver: like, the eurotrash that follows your galleries around
tacobellriver: yea
The Fuzzy Otaku: fun! my very own eurotrash!
tacobellriver: yes!

tacobellriver: most definently person of lower intelligence
The Fuzzy Otaku: aww... no... just in a different stream of inteligence
tacobellriver: no, its just lower
The Fuzzy Otaku: the obsessed with anime stream!
The Fuzzy Otaku: okay... you're right... lower.

Well, there you have it folks... the cheese monkeys.

People have been pulling my hat off all day... Arg. I love wacky hats, but I guess they're just an open invitation for people to pull 'em off and wear them. Poo. :P


Last day of school before winter break... I've been skipping around and distributing gifts to all of my friends. Whee!

I searched the internet for 'cheese monkeys' yesterday and found *gasp* that spomeone had already written a book on the subject! Check it out...

I have an obsession with webcomics. I just love reading 'em. I've tried writing a few, but never finish. How the artists of these strips keep these things alive... just amazing. A few of my personal favorites...

DMFA- Possibly the best webcomic ever, in my opinion. Just amazing. DMFA has clean art, spiffy diologue, and an easy to fllow story line. The characters are all furries (yay!), asnd each have their own special quirks- like Azlan (squee!) and his squeaky koalas of doom...

Gotta go to music now...

Ostrich meat is really yummy- a couple of weeks ago I had it at an expensive Chinese resturant and I've been craving it ever since.

Yeah... so I've been wanting to get a LiveJournal account since forever, but I was too cheap to buy one and none of my friends had one, so they couldn't give me a code. but now it's free, so I am happy. ^_^

I still have to make all my friends Christmas presents- I haven't gotten a single one yet. I've made three Christmas cards though... I have to go home and make the evil baka of doom (aka Tommy) a Moogle ploosheh if he stops threatening to glomp me (ACK!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO)

I really, really, really like cheese. Extra-sharp new York Cheddar. Melted on Breton mini's cheddar crackers. If you ever want me to do something for you, give me cheese. I will be eternally in your debt. I like swiss too. I'll even prance around in the snow, wearing a Moogle suit... but only for lots and lots of cheese.